Language gives clues

There’s a massive difference between…

(1) someone who says “She ruined my entire day…”


(2) someone who says “I have a hard time being around her…”

Notice the first statement blames someone else for an internal experience.

The second statement takes ownership.

Someone who makes the first statement feels angry and experiences powerlessness — because the cause of their unhappiness is outside of him.

Someone who makes the second statement may feel frustrated, but is EMPOWERED to change their experience in the future.

This is why, when I hear someone share that someone else “wrecked my day” or someone else “destroyed my happiness” or someone else “stole my entire life from me”…

…I hear someone who blames others for how they feel and gives away their personal power.

The farther along someone is on his personal development journey, the LESS likely he is to blame others for his (perceived) negative personal experiences and the MORE likely he is to take ownership.

Blaming others for your hurt gets you a whole lotta nowhere fast.

Listen to your language.

Do you find your words typically blame others when your life doesn’t go the way you want it to?

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