How To Avoid The “Never-Satisfied-With-My-Progress” Trap We So Easily Fall Into

The “after” photo = me. (Two years ago.) Following 2 months of hard work. Think I felt great about my progress that day?

Nope.

Funny enough, I remember laying there that day, testing my hip flexors, thinking:

  • “I am SO TIGHT.”
  • “I’m STILL not flexible.”
  • “This is hard.”

I was comparing my experience in the moment to some magical ideal off in the horizon I’d made up in which I’d lean my back easily onto the floor and all my muscles would feel loose and relaxed. Later that day, my mobility coach emailed me this side-by-side photo comparison, showing me where I’d been 2 months prior.

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh right.

GOT IT.

I had been comparing myself to my future ideal, not my past reality.

Oops.

When you compare yourself to your future ideal (or to what OTHERS can do), you will  always, ALWAYS fall short.

On the other hand, when you pull out your measuring stick and analyze where you’re at COMPARED TO WHERE YOU USED TO BE, you will INSTANTLY see your progress.

See, for the most part, we human beings are pretty shit at being able to manually gauge our own progress.

We uplevel, upgrade, improve then we quickly normalize.

All. The. Time.

Happens to me.

Even happens despite me KNOWING it’s likely to happen.

Even happens to my MindFix clients. (Truth. Many have life-changing breakthroughs they’ve NEVER had — and feel unfulfilled until we highlight where they WERE when they started—filled with self-criticism, not feeling not good enough, etc. Only after we remind them about where they started are able to grasp the magnitude of their transformations.)


Here’s the thing. Most people are constantly staring at the HORIZON (and if you’ve ever tried walking toward a horizon you know that with every step you take forward, the horizon takes a same-size step back).

But the horizon is not real; it’s an ideal.

The horizon is LITERALLY impossible for ANYONE to reach.

(Sorry, flat-Earthers — I’ll totally stand corrected if you take a photo when you get there someday.)

In relentlessly locking your focus onto ONLY your horizon, you forfeit the easy opportunity to swivel around and look BEHIND you to appreciate the incredible progress you’ve made (that everyone else behind you, of course, sees and points to in amazement).

Your horizon is a beautiful ideal that ORIENTS you toward the future you dream of—BUT if you can’t break your gaze and look behind you regularly to measure your progress, you will ALWAYS feel at least partially empty/defeated, REGARDLESS of how amazing you are and how much you accomplish.


In other words, those who never measure backwards are doomed to uplevel, improve, and succeed BUT NEVER FEEL LIKE THEY ARE.* .

* I lived this special version of hell for many years. Sooo glad to be out of it. Also, thanks to the ever-wise Dan Sullivan for introducing me to the concept of the gain/gap/horizon many years ago

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